Dealing with Adolescence on the Spiritual Path

By brother-initiate Matthew Sirpis, Sydney, Australia
(originally in English)

Today's society is ridden with temptations and a low sense of morality; so being an adolescent can often be a challenging experience. It is equally challenging for parents who have to properly guide their rebellious children through the adolescent stage.

In many countries, drug problems have become common among youth. Many take to drugs because they feel the urge to "fit in" and be a part of their peer group. Some are misguided, and some do drugs simply out of curiosity. They want to experiment with their minds and experience altered states of consciousness, or numb the pain of their lives, which may be caused by friends, family, life changes, or other factors.

Personally, I took drugs for all the above reasons. By the time I was sixteen I could easily drink more than most adults, not to mention all the other poisons I was ingesting. The parents of an adolescent may blame themselves for such behavior and respond in various ways. The question is: What is the best way to respond? I feel that my parents responded in the most responsible and mature manner possible. They made it clear that they did not support excessive drinking under their roof although I was allowed to have a beer or two with dinner. They also did not support any form of drug use and made that clear as well, but they knew they could not control me outside their home. At times, when they caught me intoxicated, they spoke to me calmly about their feelings, but generally left me alone.

I feel this was a good way to deal with the situation, because of where I am in my life today. Ultimately, through my parents' tolerant approach, I learned that I was responsible for my own actions and feelings, and a suitable amount of suffering over the years led me to the Quan Yin Method. My spiritual journey actually began with drug use, when I came to realize through drugs that other states of consciousness were possible. This prompted me to learn about meditation, which over the years slowly replaced drugs in my life. I practiced breathing meditation for a while, but realized I had come to a dead end with this practice. Then I learned the Convenient Method and received initiation.

Based on these experiences, my advice to young adults is if you can avoid the pitfalls of drug and alcohol use, and have the strength to choose the spiritual path early in life, do so. I have absolutely no regrets about my choice in this regard.

And my advice to parents is if you are initiated, then you are already setting a great example for your children. If they choose to follow you, that is their choice. Try to remain slightly detached from your children and realize that they are individuals, and not your possessions. During intimate times, tell your children how you feel. If such times do not occur, and your children refuse to talk to you, then let it be. Your children will know where to come for answers when they are ready.