We also have a destroying nature inside us. Depending on each person, the destructive tendency is higher or lower; but try to control it. Otherwise, you carry on the whole time with your destructive spirit and that’s very negative. We have both negative and positive inside, but we only use the negative when necessary. It’s not that I’m saying we can’t use it, because, a negative power, when you use it in the right place, is very good.

Just like the children at home, you’re always positive with them, encouraging them, loving them, and telling them all good things. But when they’re too naughty, when they try to be stubborn, are not obedient enough and do wrong things – harm other people or the neighbors – then you have to use a so-called negative attitude; but actually in that case, it’s positive.

You have to scold them, or maybe punish them lightly, like they have to kneel, they have to stay at home when you go out or you cut down on some of their enjoyments, pocket money or whatever. These look negative because “Oh! Parents are always supposed to be loving, forgiving, smooth and soft spoken, so why punish the children?” But they deserve it, they have to be... Otherwise they can’t turn to the positive.

That’s when negative power is for a useful purpose. Don’t say always that the negative can’t be used or the positive has to be used all the time. If you use positive power or a positive attitude in the wrong way, it becomes negative. For example, your child is very naughty – you have given him everything already, but he tries to go out to steal just for fun, or just because he associates with bad guys; or he gets drugs and goes out and breaks into people’s cars – and you tell him but he doesn’t change. If you still keep rewarding him, loving him, forgiving him, then you are negative. Then your attitude is negative. You’re spoiling him, you’re harming him, you’re harming his future, because one day the police will catch him, the neighbors will catch him, or another strong guy will hit him, break his bones, and break everything of his future and your heart as well. In that case, your positive attitude is absolutely negative.

So we have to understand this Yin-Yang nature, and make use of both accordingly. Not to dislike one and cling to the other, but to know how to use them. That’s the art of living, that is wisdom. Otherwise, how else can we survive in this world with ourselves and our loved ones. There has to be some limit. It’s the same with me. So don’t always expect me to give you candies and smile all the time. I have to do some of my negative work, and turn it into positive, turn these negative people into positive. Otherwise, you’ll never grow up.

From “Positive and Negative”
News 92, Pearls Of Wisdom
Spoken by Supreme Master Ching Hai
New Jersey Center, USA • June 24, 1992
(originally in Englsih)

There are only two choices, the positive and the negative. If the positive doesn’t act, then the negative will come. So if we don’t use our positive thinking and power, then there’s only one other choice. When the time comes, we use the negative, because the chance has passed. Then the more we use the negative, the more we get used to it, and we never do anything else, except keep using it again, again and again. We never get out of it. That’s what we call the wheel of transmigration, because we keep running inside that circle again again, and again.

From News 97, Pearls Of Wisdom
Spoken by Supreme Master Ching Hai
Raising Center, Cambodia • May 11, 1996
(originally in English)